A Hilarious Long-Winded Craigslist Ad For A Long-Wheelbase Merc

"DailyTurismo" (thedailyturismo) 02/20/2014 at 13:57 • Filed to: Daily Turismo

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Sometimes a car listing is worthy of attention not because it is a cool car, but because it comes wrapped in a funny advertisement and the invectives/hyperbole/nonsense normally reserved for a reviewer/internet-pundit/bathrobe-blogger are pre-written in the seller's own words.

This particular ad is not only knee-slapping good times, but it is a great car at a fair price too. Find this !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! is offered for $2,750 in North Dallas, TX via craigslist. Click !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! if the ad goes away.

Per the seller:

You have found the most epic Mercedes-Benz from the 1980's. The Mercedes-Benz 560 SEL sedan — featured in Car & Driver, Motor Trend and named "Car of the Year' from Wheels Magazine — it was the top of the line luxury vehicle that re-defined European automobiles. Oh, and I may as well add that it won the "Safest Car of the Year" in 1987.

Yes, it was awesome. . . and this one still is. Why? Because it is a 27-year old vintage road-treasure that has seen four presidents, the invention of Al Gore's Internet and the rise, fall and death of Kurt Cobain. It's old enough to vote, get an MBA and Botox, travel around Europe and move out of its parents' garage. It also has about 237,000 original miles. I say 'about' since the speedometer stopped working at 222,060 miles — but why should you care? Because that's the mother-fucking distance to the MOON! Yes. This car has basically been driven to and PAST the freaking moon — THE ONE IN SPACE. Why do you need to even count mileage past that point? It's pointless. Because the point is, this car has courage, tenacity, power and balls. . . balls of steel; German steel that is.

The seller continues...

It also has the world-renown 8-cyclinder, Bosch KE-Jetronic fuel injection steel German-built engine under its massive hood. It is huge and was created to provide the kind of power it takes to propel this fortress on wheels to 155 MPH. Haven't been that fast? Yes you have, and you were in a JET PLANE THAT FLEW IN THE AIR.I have personally driven this car from San Diego to Dallas on an almost non-stop road trip. The steering wheel is big, fluid and offers just enough resistance and connection to the road to give you the impression that you are not only in charge of the car, but also of your entire life's destiny. Driving it for any distance is empowering and can make you feel you can go anywhere. In fact, this car has plowed effortlessly through Death Valley, dodged falling rocks in Arizona, stared into the depth's of the Grand Canyon and climbed mountainous icy hills in Colorado.It also has spontaneously raced against a 2008-ish 7-series BMW one very late night somewhere along the North Dallas Toll Road. Neither car received a ticket but one car and driver received an embarrassing loss and lesson in total emasculation avoidance: spoiler alert. . . it wasn't the Mercedes.

Is there enough time to bring up zombies...

As for its recent history, this 560 was treated for minor dents and flawlessly re-painted with the classic factory 'Mercedes Blue' in 2011. The body is tight and doors, windows and the trunk all shut solid. The tires were also replaced and aligned in 2013 with 205/65R Pro Continental. It has the original stunning chrome wheels as bright, stylish and reflective as Justin Bieber after a week in rehab. The gaskets, hoses, and belts have been replaced along with a full tune up, including plugs, and new head gasket. The radiator has been flushed, sealed and re-filled along with a fresh injection of Mercedes engine oil. In 2011, the universal lock system was repaired along with the brake pads and lights. Up to this writing, it has been stowed away safely in the VIP section of a basement-parking garage.
One of the most outstanding features of this car is that it starts — anytime, anywhere. Whether it's 105* or -5*, F the car's engine turns over and roars to life with one simple twist of the key. There's no fumbling, cranking, pumping the pedal, stalling or waiting for the zombies to come and kill you. Fact: This car would NEVER be featured as a get-away-car in a zombie horror film because it would get you away from whatever is trying to eat, dissolve, melt, vaporize, mate, shoot or kill you.

Cigars...whiskey...yes indeed.

Speaking of films, this model shares a heritage of fame and well-deserved celebrity. It is no accident that the 560 SEL was featured in "Lethal Weapon 2" because it IS A LETHAL WEAPON of power and timeless style. This may also be a good time to point out the car made its appearance in "Die Hard: With a Vengeance" because that's exactly what this automobile does... it DIES HARD, which is why it showed up AGAIN in "LETHAL WEAPON 3". Are you getting it yet?? This is all to explain why the 560 SEL was more likely to be fitted with after-market bulletproof glass and armored body panels than ANY OTHER CAR IN THE WORLD. Oh, Did I mention the back seat has a RELCINE mode? Well, grab a Cuban cigar and glass of Macallan 25-year old scotch because IT DOES.

More funny stuff...

Does the 560 use a bit of gas when you hit the pedal? Does Mayor Rob Ford do heroin?! Of course it does! Highway mileage may hit 15 MPG if you're lucky and not towing an 18-wheeler, an ESPN Satellite truck or small house (WHICH IT CAN DO). But the trade-off for drinking premium gas like an SMU sorority pledge who just lost her promise ring at a keg party, is the acceleration and speed you'll feel as you leave a carbon footprint the SIZE OF COWBOYS STADIUM!

Now, the argument against that Leo DiCaprio Greenhouse gas nightmare is the redesign of the S-class and that it gave this model a drag coefficient of 0.36 increasing its aerodynamics by 10%. You probably don't know what any of that means and I really don't either but it sounds AWESOME. And with you, your kid, your wife and a mid-sized dog, and a full tank of gas, you'll weigh in over 4,200 lbs. That's 2.5 Mazda2's, 17 Vespas or one white adult male Rhino. Here are other facts you'll want to memorize and throw out to the multitude of gawkers gazing at your remarkably handsome vehicle as you fill up at gas stations around the planet. . .

A few more "details" from the seller...

- 5,160 mm in length — because size matters
- 5.5 litre, 5547 cm engine — dude, that's heavy
- 300 PS / 295.5 bhp / 220 kW @ 5000 rmp — this means intense power
- 455 Nm / 336 ft. lb / 46.4 kgm @ 3750 rpm — this means serious torque
- 0 — 60 mph in 7.10 seconds — faster than a Smart Car zipping down the Double Black Diamond slopes in Vail, Colorado in the middle of an avalanche.

At this point, I'd like to mention that 'torque' has nothing to do with the 'urban definition' as frequently referenced in Comedy Central's "Workaholics"... although racing 130 MPH down a car-less, and careless highway at 3:00AM may give you a hard-on.

The car also has the world's first seatbelt 'pretensioners'. What the hell is that, you ask? It was the first-ever seatbelt device that kept pretentious occupants from flying through the windshield in case of an accident. Come on. It was the premiere S-Class car. "S" as in "shit-kicker" and "stallion" and any other "s" word you can think of that giveS thiS car the reSpect it damn well deServeS!

Still reading this?

On this particular model, the AC works as long as you fill it with Freon each and every freaking summer. Alternatively, I'd suggest dressing cool and opening up the huge sunroof to let God's air cool you down. Seersucker is a very cool fabric and a dripping of timeless style AND it looks smashing with this car. During the winter, prepare to warm the flesh off your buns with the seat warmers, which are tucked underneath the blue, aged leather seats. Yes, the leather is worn, old and cracked. But so was James Coburn's face when he won a FUCKING ACADEMY AWARD in 1997 for 'Affliction'!

I almost forgot! The 560 SEL was designed by Bruno Sacco — classified as one of the greatest designers in automotive history! Look at his face and you'll see sheer genius that instilled FEAR in other European car manufactures.

Almost done...

This particular car even comes with its own German mechanic who knows the car as intimately as Tommy Lee knows Pamela Anderson. He's also handsome and speaks with an accent that is hard-to-place but would charm the DKNY pantsuit off your mother. His number and contact will be made available after purchase. What transpires between he and your mother is out of my control. Just be prepared to accept a giggly collect call from Milan or Dubai.

Still not convinced you need to own this magnificent piece of highly refined German machinery? For less than the price of a new iMac, you could be cruising down (or up) I-35 with the windows down and cranking Starship's "Nothing's Going to Stop Us Now" track (BTW: #5 on Billboard's Top 100 List in 1987) as the dusty wind from the 635 construction project whips through you hair. Oh and as long as it's on your iPod or iPhone because the original Becker Stereo doesn't work. In fact, it needs work on the interior and some other minor odds and ends. If I were to keep it, I'd immediately get back to restoring it. But I'm out of room for cars and I'm having a fight with my wife.

The seller does confuse Robert F. Kennedy with John F. Kennedy, but in his defense the seller was probably not even a twinkle in his papa's eye when either Kennedy was still alive.

One of the LAST reasons you should own this car is that famed actor / director John Frankenheimer (who personally drove John F. Kennedy to the Ambassador Hotel on that fateful day AND screen tested to play James Bond in "Dr. No.") owned, loved, washed and raced the 560 SEL.

I've driven this car with untold delight and it has been unbelievably reliable and a conversation piece that has led to and even developed into new friendships. As for you... You now have now been presented the gift to write the next chapter. Be the envy of young and old, rich and poor, drug dealers and web developers. This amazing road yacht can be yours for the small price of $2,750 in cash, Bitcoins or Gold medallions. Don't wait because someone WILL buy this car and drive it PAST the Moon and onto MARS.

If you've read this far, then call me to view and purchase. You won't regret it. I'll even throw in a pear of Brook's Brothers Seersucker shorts.

See a funnier ad? Email us here; !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!!

Originally posted as !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! on !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! . Image credits; craigslist. Tip from Ryan.

Lets Just Drive > DailyTurismo 02/20/2014 at 14:01

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Am I alone in feeling entirely put off by these kind of ad's?

When I'm browsing, I look for concise and complete information, where possible, but almost never go looking for a webcoming or novella when I'm looking at used cars. I get that the intention is to stand out, to get attention by way of being an attention-whore, but I can't be alone in the fact that when I see an ad like this, and the vehicle in question isn't some exceptional thing, I just click right by it.

505Turbeaux > DailyTurismo 02/20/2014 at 14:01

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ugh I hate the w126 leather. Havent seen a good one in a long time. MB Tex is the way to rock

Goshen, formerly Darkcode > DailyTurismo 02/20/2014 at 14:05

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Remember that ad for a teal Pontiac a year or two ago? This has just beaten it.

GhostZ > Lets Just Drive 02/20/2014 at 14:07

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That's just a sign that you haven't gotten soft and become susceptible to trickery.

Stay strong.

Lets Just Drive > GhostZ 02/20/2014 at 14:10

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Soft, in the head? Or the pants?

Or in some other, as of yet undocumented, way?

DailyTurismo > Lets Just Drive 02/20/2014 at 14:33

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Yeah, it is interesting to read the meandering thoughts of the writer, but does it make you want to buy a Pontiac Sunbird or a scooter that two dudes have ridden shirtless together? Nope.

DailyTurismo > 505Turbeaux 02/20/2014 at 14:34

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MB-Tex is awesome.

Wolc *grammar nazis go f*** yourselves* > DailyTurismo 02/21/2014 at 14:33

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and if you're not trying to sell your car http://acidcow.com/pics/56215-whe…

Rick Brasche > Lets Just Drive 02/21/2014 at 14:36

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not alone.

This is another in a series of TIAC ads that add so much noise to the signal that people just selling a car or motorcyle are lost in the hundreds of untalented attempts to come up with enough sizzle to hide the fact their steak is rotten.

Then some irony-deficient hipster snags the POS rather than a much better example for the same money and thinks he's gotten the best deal.

TheBaron2112 > DailyTurismo 02/21/2014 at 14:37

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I saw this last week when it was first posted on Oppo.

I called the guy about it. He says the ABS doesn't work, it needs new suspension (hopefully only shocks/struts as opposed to hydraulic mess), the sunroof is stuck (hopefully closed), and he estimates about $6k worth of work until it's picture perfect.

I want to say NP, but at the same time, I'm wary.

JayZAyEighty thinks C4+3=C7 > DailyTurismo 02/21/2014 at 14:39

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I once almost bought a cheap 80s MB from a hilarious ad—the guy wore lederhosen and a feathered hat and posed in various places in the car (aditionally, the plates were "P4NZER" and there were many humorous references to its German-ness and solidity). It was a 5MT-swapped W124 with 120K on the clock, and was decent cosmetically with black paint and lowered on the typical H&R/Bilstein suspension setup. The ad almost made me look past typical CL shenanigans, but when I took it for a PPI it needed more money put into it than the asking price was. So, like GhostZ said, these humorous ads are often times only facades for cars that are headed to the junk yard. There's my cool story bro story.

Also, if you buy a W126, white BBS meshes and playing songs from Miami Vice while pretending to be an 80s drug kingpin are mandatory.

ninjagin > DailyTurismo 02/21/2014 at 14:40

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This is probably one of my top 3 favorite Benzes. I love this car. The price seems pretty reasonable, too.

Ryoku > Lets Just Drive 02/21/2014 at 14:40

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Count me in that same boat, ever since that Cherokee ad was spammed across blogs more and more needlessly long-winded craiglist ads like this have shown up.

Its certainly less of a nuisance than the countless keyword-filled ads spammed across Craigslist, but at the same time, I don't care for people stroking their egos with long "look at how entertaining and quirky I am!" ads, saved the charisma for when we meet in person.

Roundle79 > 505Turbeaux 02/21/2014 at 14:40

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Can't agree.

I dig the way old-school leather ages—like a baseball glove. If the guy loved that car, he'd apply a little shoe polish to the tired sections of the seats.

Cyrus > DailyTurismo 02/21/2014 at 14:42

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My reaction. Seriously these ads aren't funny or witty but rather overdone and stupid.

i am kllot duh!! > DailyTurismo 02/21/2014 at 14:46

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i'll say say jalopnik should hire him as one of your writer.....he is a lot more entertaining then most of jalopy shit head writer that thinks the world of themselves.

BonafideSupraman > Lets Just Drive 02/21/2014 at 14:50

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I see where you're coming from, but honestly, having browsed through a million Craigslist ads, this one is still head and shoulders above at least a quarter of the ads you find on that site. This has mileage, price, and a bunch of pictures. A lot of them aren't nearly that descriptive.

YOllyou > DailyTurismo 02/21/2014 at 14:51

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I stopped reading at ...about 237,000 original miles. I've driven a Ford Escort significantly further than that, and in only 12 years. Maybe it spent too much time in the shop.

Bvnni > TheBaron2112 02/21/2014 at 14:56

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10K is a great budget, but you can get in these for 7k if you're very selective and roll the dice. The car itself will be only a couple grand and the rest is for parts and baseline work.

Some might complain about the chain problem, but like a good friend of mine used to point out: Even if you bought another OEM engine/tranny combo to put in that car, it's still cheaper than buying a new cheap car AND it will run another couple hundred thousand miles. He had an 88 420SE with 380K on it. Gorgeous car. Original engine (with chain maintenance), but with its second tranny. I, myself, had an 82 500SEL.

This is one of the few cars that I'd buy with "major issues" as long a there isn't rust where it usually is. Once rust gets in these, you're never getting it out.

Diesel > DailyTurismo 02/21/2014 at 14:59

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I stopped reading at motherfucking.

Ad_absurdum_per_aspera > Lets Just Drive 02/21/2014 at 15:00

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Usually if what I see in a car ad is babble babble babble with a thousand technical details about why the car is worth 150% as much as others like it, plus his broker's fee, because of the diligent record keeping on PCV valve maintenance, it merely sets off my snow-job alert. "Getting fast-talked" is a figure of speech for a reason.

This one is different. The guy has a sense of humor and likes to write. ("It has the original stunning chrome wheels as bright, stylish and reflective as Justin Bieber after a week in rehab.") Plus, he doesn't actually want much money for the car and is reasonably candid about its shortcomings as well as its strengths.

BrianMadigan > DailyTurismo 02/21/2014 at 15:00

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$2700 is a nice price, even if it has made the moon trip a few times.

Turbineguy: Nom de Zoom > DailyTurismo 02/21/2014 at 15:01

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Is this one of those 1,400hp Benzes like the one Loggia drove in Lost Highway?

ADeleteMe > DailyTurismo 02/21/2014 at 15:01

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Lack of oxford comma = no buy.

carom > YOllyou 02/21/2014 at 15:04

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Well, you should have read the next sentence.. but apart from that, I don't get your point anyway.

DailyTurismo > ADeleteMe 02/21/2014 at 15:08

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Sometimes if I eat too much cereal I feel like I am in a coma. Cereal coma.

DailyTurismo > TheBaron2112 02/21/2014 at 15:11

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$6k of work from a MBZ shop could be about $1k of work from a properly skilled DIYer with pelicanparts on speed-dial...but $6k of DIY work could be $24k at a shop...

Good info though!

winters4 > 505Turbeaux 02/21/2014 at 15:15

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Hell yeah, mb tex all the way!

BrianMadigan > TheBaron2112 02/21/2014 at 15:17

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It's a multi-link suspension, coil springs on the lower a-arms, no struts. The suspension has a lot of rubber bushings (big ones) which generally are pressed into place in the replacement parts. So when you do fix the suspension, you basically put a whole new suspension on thing, excluding the springs and spindles. I bought one that needed engine work, front suspension, ABS didn't work, engine had high idle problem (ICU 'computer' is fragile and costs over $200 usually, for a questionable rebuilt unit) , radiator was shot, need brakes all around including rotors.. That was just the first year. Then the transmission clutches fell apart, requiring a rebuild, which was something I couldn't handle in my driveway. Oh I also repainted it (clear coat was coming right off), it now needs its "Awesome" Bosch fuel injection mostly replaced, needs new hard fuel and brake lines, new exhaust. It also needs a camshaft, shit, might as well do both, and to figure out why the camshaft is wearing funny on one lobe in the first place. It's already had the equivalent of $6k worth of work done, most of which I did for the cost of parts and many weekends and nights. It still needs another $6k to be 'perfect' if you can ever call it that. . Mine is a coupe too. It's not great for around town; it really is a highway machine. It is rather good looking though.

SDouglas > DailyTurismo 02/21/2014 at 15:19

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I can see where those were taken from my office window.

BrianMadigan > JayZAyEighty thinks C4+3=C7 02/21/2014 at 15:22

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I remember that P4NZER from the benzworld.org forums. Which is where you learn that all W126 owners are old, rich and in the midst of a messy divorce or divorced, and can't be told their cars are shit.

Coty > YOllyou 02/21/2014 at 15:25

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You're bitching about the milage being too low?! You must be the one.

My '88 300SE, for the record, is right around 114k

dogisbadob > Lets Just Drive 02/21/2014 at 15:26

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You are not the only one

mike in So Cal > DailyTurismo 02/21/2014 at 15:26

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from what ive read, bodywork is the hard part. if its cosmetically flawless,runs, and mechanical parts are easily/cheaply available? i see NP, but im not a big merc fan

Shane Elliott > Lets Just Drive 02/21/2014 at 15:26

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I'm with you. They're such a cliche now. The first few were amusing, but for anyone actually looking to buy a car, this kind of shit is just annoying. Though I suppose if you do it well enough, you'll get free publicity like this

Freddy "Tavarish" Hernandez > DailyTurismo 02/21/2014 at 15:44

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I'm not going to say that this is plagiarism, but elements of his description have an uncanny resemblance to the ones in my beater civic ad that I posted a while back.

Here's what I wrote:
"Miles are a thing of the past. When you measure things in terms of miles, it's easy to get mixed up as to how much is "too much". For reference, the distance from the Earth to the moon is 225,622 miles. The circumference of the moon is 6,784 miles. To put this in perspective, this car could have driven to the moon, then when it got there, circled it 5 times and still had more than 1,000 miles left for detours. Except this car didn't do something as boring as go into the lifeless vacuum of space. It traversed a sprawling world of shopping malls, university parking decks, highways and even a park or two, all without batting an eye or breaking a sweat because it's just that good. These weren't "easy highway miles" by any stretch of the imagination. It had to make its way through 75 seasons of torture, and came out on the other end without so much as a cough or sputter. It wears its 260,582 miles with pride and will continue to do so happily. Think of it as an employee that's overworked and underpaid, but comes to work 30 minutes early because it's the RIGHT THING TO DO."

Full article: http://apidaonline.com/index.php/arti ...

I have either found my soul mate or have been ripped off. Either way, it was a very enjoyable read.

Freddy "Tavarish" Hernandez > DailyTurismo 02/21/2014 at 15:44

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Edit: double post.

pieceofSchmitt > BrianMadigan 02/21/2014 at 16:00

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the coupe is gorgeous. driving with the b pillar down is worth all the work.

sounbwoy > DailyTurismo 02/21/2014 at 16:08

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"The radiator has been flushed, sealed and re-filled along with a fresh injection of Mercedes engine oil." Wait.. what???

996C2 > DailyTurismo 02/21/2014 at 16:11

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He had me until the Rob Ford comment...

none8239487234 > DailyTurismo 02/21/2014 at 16:16

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TL;DR I love mine though. SWB Euro model in dictator black.

bigdog > DailyTurismo 02/21/2014 at 16:17

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Sooooooo, crack pipe? because maintenance and he would rather be a funny guy than be honest about the true condition. I'd rather get my used Miata on.

Mr-JonQ > Lets Just Drive 02/21/2014 at 16:25

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I feel like anytime someone can make a grin appear on my face it was worth it. This did just that. If you don't like the long windedness of the article skip to the points you want to know eg price, mileage ect... or just call the person. No need to get all 'hum-bug' about it because one in 1000 ads tries to add some sense of humor in their marketing.

fintail > 505Turbeaux 02/21/2014 at 16:26

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It's not too hard to re-dye.

I like this car enough - one of the best 126 colors, but it needs more work than I could ever give it. They seem to go downhill when sitting in the sun.

505Turbeaux > fintail 02/21/2014 at 16:28

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it isnt about the color, more the way the leather shrinks...again in the sun. Tex is just bomb proof

fintail > DailyTurismo 02/21/2014 at 16:33

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I love the color (not sure if it is "diamond blue" or "silver blue"), reminds me of my old 126, seen here ages ago with the older beast.

I am too lazy to resurrect one, but if it was pristine, would be tempting, even with a commensurate price.

fintail > 505Turbeaux 02/21/2014 at 16:35

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123s and 116s seem to fare worst - the door cards and trim wrinkle, sometimes the seat stuffing collapses , and it shrinks like you mention. On later cars it doesn't seem as bad, especially into the late 80s. I live in a low sun area though.

Kruezerman > DailyTurismo 02/21/2014 at 16:51

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That's ugly and bare.

Mau_Ferrusca > DailyTurismo 02/21/2014 at 17:50

0

This:
It was the first-ever seatbelt device that kept pretentious occupants from flying through the windshield in case of an accident.

This was funny, and very.

JayZAyEighty thinks C4+3=C7 > BrianMadigan 02/21/2014 at 17:51

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Haha that's pretty funny that it was on there! It seems like most guys who own older, expensive European luxury cars think that their car is one of the best for some reason. They'll dump money into them until some constraining circumstance takes it all away, I guess. I'll try to find the car on there. It was basically a parts car as I discovered, but neat nonetheless.

zyodei > Lets Just Drive 02/21/2014 at 18:10

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Here's the thing: it's free to post a craigslist add.

The guy can post one concise add for you, and one ridiculous rambling ad like this for anyone who might appreciate that.

He has nothing to lose, and increases his chances of selling.

BrianMadigan > JayZAyEighty thinks C4+3=C7 02/21/2014 at 18:17

1

I think the people on benzworld who horde all the hard to find parts are the reason those parts are hard to find. There are lots of pics of that P4NZER car. He had some nice looking stuff to take pictures of, but I'm sure they were mechanically shot.

Harrycarry250 > DailyTurismo 02/21/2014 at 18:19

0

I posted this ad on opposite lock a week before it was on daily turismo... Could a brotha get some credit?

DailyTurismo > Harrycarry250 02/21/2014 at 18:35

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Sorry dude, I didn't see it on oppo - I got a tip via email from someone else - who knows, maybe he saw it from another source that saw it on oppo...etc...you know what they say, only 6 degrees kelvin and your bacon goes from flaccid to crispy.

Reply with the link.

masteroftubesocks > 505Turbeaux 02/21/2014 at 18:36

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The MB Tex in my 240D was still like new even when the rest of the car was falling apart due to rust.

Harrycarry250 > DailyTurismo 02/21/2014 at 18:50

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yup...

Half-Caulked Jack > DailyTurismo 02/21/2014 at 20:04

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If I didn't already own a 300SEL of the same generation, I would be calling this man right now.

the motors for the sunroof are in the trunk. my gawd.

mmmmmbeer > Lets Just Drive 02/21/2014 at 21:09

0

I agree. It's been done, folks. Move on to something else. It does this car a disservice, because it actually does seem like a pretty nice MB. But how many people are just going to pass it by because the ad looks like it's trying to put lipstick on a pig?

parkrndl is enjoying his midlife crisis > BrianMadigan 02/21/2014 at 21:34

0

Mmmmm. Always thought the 560SEC was sexay.

wkiernan > sounbwoy 02/21/2014 at 21:40

0

Busted head gasket.

GrettaSeven > DailyTurismo 02/22/2014 at 01:53

0

Pretentious, contrived BS. Designed just to be featured on sites like this. A well-designed attention getter. I stopped reading after the first para. The rest is BS I am sorry for you that you read it. A high mileage POS that is worth $1K or less. More as parts. Period, move on.

Just Cars for Joe Bryant > DailyTurismo 02/22/2014 at 15:36

0

Yep nothing quite like that German (Krupp) Steel, takes a fleet to sink her, and then no one is sure if the fleet actually did the job.

K Bismarck, the ocean going equivalent to the MB S-Class.

none8239487234 > GrettaSeven 02/22/2014 at 18:44

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I agree with you on the article for sure. Very pretentious. As for the car itself that I tend to disagree with you on. I have one with over 400K on it. Unlike modern cars of today the Mercedes Benz's of this era were designed to last forever. With the enthusiasts that love these cars $2600 is not a bad deal for a car like that. Much nicer examples in better color combos can fetch just shy of the 10K mark and sell with ease.

none8239487234 > Kruezerman 02/22/2014 at 18:49

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What? Not enough flashy LED lights and LCD screens for you? I personally love the simplicity of the 126's interior. They could have done a lot more and put more buttons and knobs and switches in there but they had restraint and made it simple. It's a timeless interior.

Modern interiors are interesting but the thing that strikes me about them is in 10 years many of the toys will no longer be supported and will become obsolete. Personally I would rather look at beautiful burled walnut than a bunch of obsolete technogadgets that don't make sense to use anymore.

Kruezerman > none8239487234 02/22/2014 at 19:12

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Not at all, but the placement and design of the center controls place them too far apart, makes it look like a waste of space. It's like using an 8x11 to post a pic and the pic is only one square inch.

none8239487234 > Kruezerman 02/23/2014 at 12:55

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It's a big dashboard. If it were plastic I would probably agree with you about the ugly part. In this case it's a super nice burled wood. This car also does not have "all" of the options in most normal cars you would find black plastic blanks. Mercedes does not do that and designs specific panels for the vehicles.

Now if you want something "legitimate" to complain about a Mercedes dashboard one of the things that bugs me a bit about my W140 is the center console does not line up with the vents. It's not terrible but it is slightly distracting to the eyes.

none8239487234 > 505Turbeaux 02/23/2014 at 12:58

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The leather in early 126's kind of sucks I agree. Check out 89-91 though. Some massive improvements. Blue is always a difficult color when it comes to dye coming off but that's easily fixed. I personally just don't like the pattern of the early cars with leather myself. I'm thankful I don't have it in mine. :)

Kruezerman > none8239487234 02/23/2014 at 13:16

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That's an OCD nightmare.

none8239487234 > Kruezerman 02/24/2014 at 03:26

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Agreed. Good thing I'm not OCD. It's slightly annoying but the rest of the car is so impressive you can see well beyond it.

GrettaSeven > none8239487234 02/24/2014 at 23:18

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True. A few years ago I bought a 1991 735iL w/200K miles for $1K from original old lady owner. Drove it for two years and sold it with almost 300K for $500. Changed oil and brake pads myself. They last if taken care of...

none8239487234 > GrettaSeven 02/25/2014 at 14:06

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I secretly always loved the 7's of that era up until the final ones until BMW replaced it with the "abomination" that is currently the 7 series. I never bought one though.

The only problem of course is BMW never built them to last like MB did. The V8's and V12's were close to impossible to keep running. The 6's were pretty decent of course but still suffer from a lot of the BMW construction issues. The Value your seeing with that 7 is due to the reputation that the V8's and V12's gave the platform as well as the construction quality of the 7 in general.

The W126's are still fetching between $2k and up into the 30K range for something like a rare AMG coupe. These cars can do this because they have the legendary Mercedes build quality. High mileage does not scare off MB owners because the cars are built to last.

I have no idea of the market value of my "high mileage" w126 sedan but considering it's "dictator black" and has some rare options I know for certain it would not go super cheap. Here's what a 400K high mileage w126 looks like. Interior and exterior look very much brand new.

Part of what keeps the value of these cars strong is the owners themselves. MB owners are a different breed all together. We keep our cars for a long time and spare no expense on service and repairs. I have owned my two S class sedans for well over 10 years at this point and have no plans on selling them anytime soon. I have the W126 you see in the photos and a W140 sedan also in "dictator black".

This "buy for forever" attitude that MB owners display is unfortunately not found in other makes other than some of the Italian Exotics and British high end makes like Bentley and Rolls Royce. One of my other cars is a black Range Rover P38 one of the worst engineered Range Rovers ever made. It costs a kings ransom to keep running but it's a lovely vehicle. Range Rover owners "typically" are very similar to BMW owners and like to "move on" quickly and leave problems for other owners.

Of course all of these statements are massive generalizations but it's what I have found. At the end of the day any car will last if you love it enough. That's really what powers longevity. Every car made has it's faults and it's the owners love that can persevere to keep the car running forever. Some cars are easier to love and easier to keep running of course. MB has made it really easy to love their cars and engineered them to be cost effective for long term ownership.

GrettaSeven > none8239487234 02/25/2014 at 22:14

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This was mine. Was really an awesome car. Got horrible mileage, about 10 mpg in the city. The engine was bulletproof though. Inside was like new; the old lady did not abuse it. Cost me less than $50 per month in insurance... Everything still worked on it - power head rests, heated seats, reverse mirror action was awesome for parallel parking, and so on. Nothing but good memories. I guess I just got lucky...

none8239487234 > GrettaSeven 02/26/2014 at 12:57

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Image did not come though. Wow that's shocking mileage out of a 6cyl. I have cars with V8's that do better than that. Heck my 6cyl W140 pulls in a solid 25mpg all day long. :)

As long as you have good memories that's all that matters.

GrettaSeven > none8239487234 02/26/2014 at 21:53

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GrettaSeven > GrettaSeven 02/26/2014 at 21:55

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The mileage was horrid. I think the car was way too heavy for the 3.5L. I think I was getting high teens on the highway. It was worth it because it was so cheap anyway...

none8239487234 > GrettaSeven 02/27/2014 at 01:20

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Ah yes. Very nice cars indeed. One day I may try my luck at one of the big 6cyl powered 7's. Interestingly enough my W140 is quite peppy with the 3.2L engine. Mercedes did a lot with the rear end ratio on the car and the output of the 3.2 to make it quite a nice package. I drove some of the earlier 6cyl w140's and the 6 seemed too small for the car. The later model (mine's the last production year for the w140) the 6 is more than ample because of the enhanced gearing.

none8239487234 > GrettaSeven 02/27/2014 at 01:21

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Absolutely. Those 7's are a lot of car for not a lot of money. They have their shortcomings of course but with the 6 the situation is a lot better than with the 8 or the 12.

DavidB > Freddy "Tavarish" Hernandez 03/06/2014 at 14:47

1

That is awesome! I never saw your ad until now. We may be related. Meet you at the family reunion in San Jose next June.

-David

DavidB > Cyrus 03/06/2014 at 14:52

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Thanks for reading it, that's what counts. You can hate it all you like... or all you hate rather.

-David

DavidB > SDouglas 03/06/2014 at 14:54

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Galleria garage between tower 1 and 3. Yes, and I got chased off by the security guards before the shots were all done.

-David

DavidB > ADeleteMe 03/06/2014 at 14:56

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Dammit! Missed that! I'm dyslexic, so that should count towards a few errors. or eros.

-David

Freddy "Tavarish" Hernandez > DavidB 03/06/2014 at 22:15

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Did we just become best friends?